Posts Tagged ‘anxiety’

To people hearing about it theoretically, premature ejaculation could look like a small problem. But to the people directly affected by premature ejaculation, the couple where the man ejaculates prematurely, this can be a devastating problem.

On the Man’s side

On the man’s side, for one, premature ejaculation means ‘inability to perform’. This is a huge blow to him, because men are very performance-oriented in their thinking. He may try to mask it, making it look as if he is in control of his attitude towards his premature ejaculation problem, but he still ends up feeling as if his worth as a man is in question. Then the fears set in, enhancing the psychological stress from the already bad situation that set in when the premature ejaculation started. Subconsciously, at least, the man wonders, for instance, whether his woman will end up straying; now that he is unable to satisfy her due to his premature ejaculation. If its quite a casual relationship he has – like those college students have with each other – the man ends up developing a fear, again at least subconsciously, that ‘news’ about his premature ejaculation may spread around and ‘dent his social resume.’

The problem of premature ejaculation can be extremely distressing, both to the primary sufferers (the men afflicted of it), and their sexual partners.

The problem, in a nutshell

Basically, what happens in premature ejaculation is that a man, during sexual intercourse, ends up ejaculating before their partner has had the opportunity to get satisfied with the intercourse. As we all know, women take a little bit longer than men to achieve penetrative orgasm, so that if a man ejaculates too early on, the woman is left unsatisfied or ‘hanging’ as some people put it. The severity of the premature ejaculation problem varies from case to case, with the worst sufferers being men who end up ejaculating immediately upon gaining vaginal penetration. There are other premature ejaculators who are able to hold for quite some time, but not long enough to satisfy their female partners.

To a man, premature ejaculation ranks right up there with the pain of delivering a baby for a woman. The physical pain certainly does not compare, but the emotional and psychological trauma makes it just as horrid.

The question for a man can be, why can’t he last longer, how to stop premature ejaculation? The answer has to do with the underlying cause of the problem. For some men, it is simply a matter of some sort of psychological issue. Perhaps, back when he was first becoming sexually active, he learned to masturbate very quickly (out of fear of discovery by his parents). As a result, he’s now very quick in bed. A high level of serotonin is the main cause of premature ejaculation. A leading cause of high serotonin levels is anxiety, as the primitive part of the brain readies the body for action. This causes the body to produce more of this neurotransmitter chemical.

Consequences of being a premature ejaculator

When a man experiences premature ejaculation, they feel very self-conscious about their sexual ability. Often they will avoid intimacy since they feel that they are not able to fulfill or satisfy their partner. The men even feel ashamed.

Being a premature ejaculator is a common situation. There are methods to use that will help with the quick release. Some include changing positions to reduce the pleasurable sensations that cause early release. Before avoiding sexual contacts, a man should find alternatives that will prolong the ejaculation.

The exact cause for premature ejaculation is unknown. There are suspected factors that contribute to it, mainly psychological factors, and possibly biological factors.

In the younger years of life, men are inexperienced in their sexual encounters. This leads to him having trouble controlling the natural urges to climax. He is in a hurry in some circumstances so he fails to take his time to allow his partner enjoyment or longer experiences. When a man is young, he is often rushed or not in a private environment where he can take his time. He may feel like he is out of control with the sexual urges so he fails to maintain control and ejaculates quickly. To the youth or inexperienced, reaching climax is a quick process leading to the unconscious habit that can continue onto the later years and other sexual encounters.